I have a proposition for you on this Monday morning: do it over. It something didnâ€™t work out the first time, do it over. Erase it. Reboot. Reload. Or at the very least â€“ try to.
Humans sure are obsessed with time, arenâ€™t we? â€œWhatâ€™s done is doneâ€ or â€œyou canâ€™t change the past.â€ We see time as so linear; one attempt and failure is forever etched in our mind. Whether itâ€™s about health, relationships, or workâ€¦ I donâ€™t know about you, but I very often fall off the horse, curse the horse, and take the damn bus instead. I tried, and now itâ€™s over. There are no real do overs in life.
Or are there?
When we moved, our wedding album ended up being unearthed from a box and placed in our closet on a shelf. After not really looking at it for three years, I now see it every single morning.
When youâ€™re getting married, everyone tells you, â€œYou only get ONE wedding day. Thereâ€™s only ONE shot to create the best memories. Hire a good photographer! You can never recreate that day.â€ In fact, so many people said that to us that the Husband and I were completely obsessed with hiring the perfect photographer and getting the perfect photos. The reality? The day was perfect, but our wedding photos were lackluster. I couldâ€™ve take better photos with my point-and-shoot camera and three tequila shots in my system. There were a few good shots of family and friends, which was very important, but all the â€˜big shotsâ€™ of us as a couple â€“ standing at the altar, our first kiss â€“ were poorly shot or non-existent. The Hus and I flipped through the proofs and turned to each other with a dismayed look in our eyes. Our one chance for perfect photographsâ€¦ gone.
I know this seems like a silly example (because, letâ€™s be honest, good wedding photos are not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of your marriage), but we mourned our wedding photos for months. Untilâ€¦ we decided to do it over. We couldnâ€™t re-invite all 80 guests, but we could pull on our fancy clothes, hire another photographer, and head back to our wedding location. So we did.
The beautiful wedding photos hung up in our home were taken six months after our wedding. Does anyone realize it but us (and you)? Probably not. We just look at the photos and see two very happy people on a very special day.
Maybe there are do overs in life. Maybe you can go back and try again. You canâ€™t always go back and do it the exact same way, with the exact same people. Time does past. Things do change. But things are not always so black and white. Perhaps, if you can just see things from another perspective, every day is a chance to reload and try again.