Don’t forget that the Healthy Living Summit Golden Ticket Charity Auction starts tomorrow!

 

I had a wonderful breakfast of Oikos yogurt, Kashi TLC bar, and banana, but my camera ate the photograph this morning — just visualize the yumminess, mmkay?

 

And for lunch, I had a bean wrap:

CIMG6910

My wrap contained dark red kidney beans, cheddar cheese, and lettuce.

 

Plus grapes:

CIMG6907

And a bowl of watermelon:

CIMG6906

Negative Noise and Energy Vampires

 

Lately, my recent blogging successes have forced me to deal with a lot of negative noise and energy vampires.  I’ve been thinking a lot about how my situation is not unique to blogging, but is really a metaphor for life.  I wanted to share some thoughts and hear your opinion.

 

If you read the comments associated with the half-dozen news articles that have been written about Operation Beautiful, many of these comments are shockingly inflammatory and degrading to both the mission, the participants, and me.  It’s obvious to me that these people 1) need psychological help and 2) have not even bothered to go to the website.

 

My mantra is that these types of comments are "negative noise."  Negative noise are small actions that distract you, stop you from being productive, and threaten to ruin your day.  Most urgently, negative noise threatens to overwhelm all the positive encouragement in your life.  But remember — it’s just noise.  It’s meaningless dribble. 

 

Negative noise exists in real life as much as it does in the blogging community.  The Husband calls people like this "energy vampires."  They suck away your positive energy and you feel exhausted after dealing with them.   He encounters a lot of people like this at his work, and I know I’ve dealt with "friends" who were really energy vamps in disguise.

 

How do you deal with negative noise and energy vampires?

 

  • Ignore the noise as much as possible.  Whether it is someone in your life who sprouts negativity about your new healthy lifestyle or an anonymous commentor online, ignore them.  As Kath once wisely told me, negative noise is not worth your energy.
  • Turn your anger into sympathy.  Negative noise and energy vampires can elicit a great deal of anger in the person on the receiving end — if you get angry, you are letting them win because they are sucking up you positivity.  If you can, feel BAD for the person instead of being MAD at them.
  • Don’t try to understand an energy vampire’s motivations.  See Rule #1 — just ignore them.  There are LOADS of reasons why people behave like this, but truthfully — who cares to figure it out?  Again, you are wasting your time by ruminating on it.
  • Disengage.  Disengage yourself from the situation.  Whether that means you have to disable commenting on your blog, dump a friend, or stop talking to your mother about your attempts to eat healthier, disengage so the energy vampires cannot get to you.
  • Spend your time wisely. Instead of spending your time on a negative person, talk to a positive person and encourage them. 
  • Realize that positivity ALWAYS trumps negativity.  Trust me, karma is a bitch.  

 

When have you encountered negative noise or energy vampires?  At work, at school, at the gym? In your friendships or relationships?  How have you successfully fought negative noise?

{ 95 comments }

 

  • whitsgettingfit July 7, 2009, 8:21 am

    I love this post, Caitlin! I find that when I am around so-called 'energy vampires' it is best to walk away and ignore the bad energy. I have had to cut some people out of my life, but I have really come out the better!

  • SuperDots July 7, 2009, 8:26 am

    Hey Caitlin!

    This is a great post–I am going to try tp print it and then stick into my exercise/diet/thoughts and feelings binder.

    I try to remember your tips for tuning out the noise, but I forget every now and then. The biggest negative noise and energy vampire in my life is sadly, my own sister. I just keep trying to plug along and remember the tips you have listed. They DO help.

    If it's not family, I am incredibly quit to cut the person out.

    Since in my case, it IS family–well, I just do my best to tune out the negative noise. The "sister" needs help, and it's something someone else, or herself, will have to help her get.

    In ANY case—I am sending positive vibes you way. I know it's hard to keep a public blog like yours–it really leaves the door open to criticism. You are inspiring and have many loyal readers–just keep your head up πŸ™‚

  • Melinda July 7, 2009, 8:29 am

    Sorry that you've had to deal with these "energy vampires"- I know exactly the types and I just don't even associate with them- I only associate with positive people that make me happy πŸ™‚

  • insideiamdancing July 7, 2009, 8:30 am

    LOVE this post Caitlin! This is something I struggle with a lot- not letting it bring *me* down… Love your list- I've been trying to have sympathy rather than anger and it's helped a lot. I am also starting to see that a lot of 'friends' I have really do bring me down, possibly without meaning to and am trying to withdraw a little… I feel guilty for not trying to pull them UP, but there is only so much I can take/do…

  • brandi July 7, 2009, 8:34 am

    i think it's the hardest when it is family. thankfully, I don't have any people in my family that are bad now, but it was hard changing my habits and my life at first when they expect you to be the same all the time.

  • Thinspired July 7, 2009, 8:34 am

    I couldn't believe some of the ridiculous comments left on the site. You are handling it beautifully. I especially like, "Don't try to understand an energy vampire's motivations"–I tend to try to dissect people a lot when they hurt my feelings and understand where they are coming from, but really it's pointless because most of the time they don't even know themselves (and I cant' fix them anyway!).

  • dailygoods July 7, 2009, 8:35 am

    its hard to ignore these energy vampires, but its really the only thing you can do! thanks so much for your endless inspiration that you give to SO many women out there! you are making a MOVEMENT and no one should down play that! you deserve every bit of recognition for something so positive you started!

  • jpalacio July 7, 2009, 8:41 am

    Totally love this post . . . some ppl are such mean-spirited debbie downers and we all just gotta remember to not take things to heart =]

  • Lindsay Y. July 7, 2009, 8:43 am

    Thanks for this post, Caitlin! I can definitely relate, as I'm sure most everyone can. I try to remind myself to ignore the negative people I come in contact with, but it can certainly be hard. I, like Thinspired, was really struck by your advice, "Don't try to understand an energy vampire's motivations." I've never quite thought of it that way, and I can see that that's exactly what I do, and it's really harmful. By trying to understand where someone's negativity is coming from, we start giving into our own insecurities and trying to justify the person's negative thoughts. Not cool!

    Anyway, thanks for giving me a bit of new perspective on negative noise, and keep up all the great work!

  • Char July 7, 2009, 8:43 am

    Wow, that is ridiculous for people to try to muddy the real goal here with negativity. Sorry to hear that. You will pull through triumphant for sure in this one!

  • Leslie July 7, 2009, 8:45 am

    I was interviewed on CNN a couple of years ago when I made hajj, the pilgrimage to Mecca. After seeing some of the comments that get posted on anything dealing with Islam, and a couple on the video of me, I decided I wasn't going to look at comments on the CNN site or on YouTube. I don't allow that kind of negativity to enter my world if I have the choice.

  • Hi! I'm Erin July 7, 2009, 8:53 am

    I was amazed at some of the rude comments! I am guilty of trying to figure out why people are so negative instead of just acknowledging that they have a problem and moving on. I'll never figure out why so I shouldn't even waste valuable time of my life thinking about it. I will try to remember that the next time I have to deal with those energy vamps.

  • katherine July 7, 2009, 8:53 am

    I'm so sorry you're getting negative responses to such a great movement!!

    I agree with Whit – sometimes the best thing to do is just walk away. With friendships, I've had to end some and it's hurt, but I've been better off for it in the long run. The key is reminding myself to look long term. Someone's comments might hurt right now, or I might be sad because I've ended a friendship, or heard something unkind, but what matters is how I feel and act in the long run!!

  • Sam July 7, 2009, 9:01 am

    I LOVE this post! I used to work with a really negative guy and he just left me feeling so drained and miserable all the time. It wasn’t until after he left that I realised how much he was affecting me. I’m so much happier in the office now. People have made negative comments about my eating and exercise habits, too. It’s hard not to let it get to you, but I’m really going to try from now on. Thanks Caitlin!

  • Tami July 7, 2009, 9:08 am

    you have to wonder why these people are like that, what in their life is so wrong or bad that they act this way? in the past year or so i have stepped away from a lot of negative things in my life and i feel so much better about it.

  • Jennifer @ His N' Her Health July 7, 2009, 9:19 am

    Love this post. My negative noise comes from someone in my family. Sort of. (boyfriend's sister's boyfriend. haha) He always makes comments about my eating habits and always offers me meat. I think it is so rude! I literally just walk away and ignore him. He isn't worth my time!

  • The Faux Foodie July 7, 2009, 9:19 am

    it's just jealousy, they wish they came up with the idea first or accomplished what you have…alltogether misearable beings…cut them out, ignore and keep going, you are doing a great out here…

  • Jess July 7, 2009, 9:28 am

    When it comes to negativity I just try to use my mantra which is "rise above," it's really hard not to take things that people say personally, but unfortunately there are a lot of people out there who just can't stand to see others be successful. Hang it there!

    PS. Your wrap looks really yummy.

  • naturallyfrugal July 7, 2009, 9:28 am

    It's true, you just have to ignore those Negative Nancy's and read all the wonderful comments that you get on the blog every single day.
    What you're doing is revolutionary, so of course there are going to be those who automatically react negatively to it. For whatever reason some people don't like positive change, and that just can't be helped.
    Great post and good job keeping perspective!

  • foregoingperfection July 7, 2009, 9:37 am

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for this wonderful post! I got my first negative comment on my blog about a week ago and it really hurt. I'm admittedly more sensitive than I should be and I couldn't stop thinking about the negative things this "energy vampire" (<–love that!) was saying about me, when they didn't even know me! Eventually I just had to get over it and remind myself that there are a ton of people out there who are supporting me.

    Negative noise is an issue for everyone and I think your tips were great! And Operation Beautiful is SO amazing!! Don't let that negative noise block out all the good you are doing!

    -Emma K.

  • Amy July 7, 2009, 9:41 am

    Its funny, I can't even read the news online anymore due to the comments left after the articles.

    They absolutely infuriate me. T

    Yes, I know everyone is entitled to their opinion.

    That being said, there is a big difference between opinion and ignorance.

    Way to go Caitlin. You're doing a beautiful thing.

  • Heather July 7, 2009, 9:42 am

    When people try to bring me down it inspires me to push harder, to prove them wrong. I have yet to write to Operation Beautiful but after seeing how people are treating it, I want to join the movement! I will be sending an e-mail later today! What you are doing is G-R-E-A-T!

  • Mrs. Myers @ Eat Move Write July 7, 2009, 9:43 am

    You are completely right. This actually happened recently to Cristin over at Eat Like Me (on Self.com). Someone did an article (Washington Post, I think) about her blog and people just blew up, saying terrible things. If you read Eat Like Me, you get it. Same with Op Beautiful. People will be people. Let em talk, and keep doing good work.

  • Aimee July 7, 2009, 9:48 am

    I can't believe you are getting negative comments about Operation Beautiful. So sad that there are people that have to put down something so wonderful!

  • chandra July 7, 2009, 9:50 am

    You know, it's funny… sometimes I think you can read my mind.

    No joke here, I've been trying to type up a similar post for 2 days now. I've been very up & down emotionally the past couple weeks and it is all because of a so-called "friend" (who was at one point a best friend) who has become a major vampire and noise maker in my life. I've dealt with quite a few "friends" like these and it just isn't worth it.

    Hopefully I'll get my post out soon and I'll reference your tips. πŸ™‚ Thanks for reading my mind AGAIN. lol

    ps – I haven't seen the negative comments, mainly because I don't get time to read comments typically, but you know that you and what you are doing are both amazing and that's all that matters. πŸ˜‰

  • Eliza July 7, 2009, 9:56 am

    The anonymity of the internet allows people to be assholes. Thats pretty much it. I usually don't read comments, especially on news sites, because they make me sick. I follow news about domestic and sexual violence pretty closely because of my job, and people say awful, horrible, disgusting things about victims of these crimes all the time, like she asked for it, etc.
    I did write a letter to our local newspaper after some pretty awful comments were posted on a story about a teacher who raped a student (she said yes to the sex/relationship, so people were writing about how "girls these days dress" and how she probably flirted, and men can't control themselves…it was BAD). I asked that in stories where a victim of a crime is still alive that they disable comments to prevent future harm. I mean, imagine what its already like for this girl going back to school, let alone reading the internet!
    Fortunately they listened to me, but some idiots continue to post similarly inappropriate comments in other places.

  • THE ACTORS DIET July 7, 2009, 9:58 am

    I've gotten some "negative noise" as an actor – from people in the biz, my family, even my "fans." Seems like everyone has an opinion – I try not to base the way I feel about myself on what others say – and that goes for the good stuff, too….

  • applecrumbles July 7, 2009, 9:58 am

    Love the term "energy vampires". It is so perfect! As for me, I have trouble fighting the negative energy suppliers out there. Everything is taken so personally then I think I need to better myself somehow – someway.
    I can get mad but for the most part, don't handle those "vampires" very well.

  • Anonymous July 7, 2009, 10:08 am

    The irony here is you mention these comments being inflammatory and degrading…but that hardly seems to be the case. It just seems like some posters don't particularly agree with your approach… your interpretation of that that suggests a bit of thin skin on your part.

    So I ask – is it wrong for people to simply not interpret these notes in the same way you do? I'm not asking this to be a jerk, I'm mostly curious. It may boost your ego to start such a project and it may even boost the ego of some others but the simple fact is some recipients will not interpret these things in the same way that you do.

    -A Reader

  • Caitlin at Healthy Tipping Point July 7, 2009, 10:09 am

    A reader – I do not think its "ironic" that people are writing "you're all fat pigs, get to a gym" or "you are not beautiful, you are a lazy slob."

  • Tabby July 7, 2009, 10:13 am

    I've definitely had experience with a few energy vampires! People that I thought were my good friends but turned into those positive energy sucking people. When I've encountered these people I just try to slowly cut them out of my life. I find other people to talk to in group situations and stop hanging out with them one on one. Although I usually end up feeling bad for cutting someone out of my life, it is usually for the best and I always feel better in the long run. Especially with the support of my true friends!

  • haya July 7, 2009, 10:17 am

    i ruthlessly cut out people in my life who are a drain on my energy/positivity. i have done this with at least 3 "friends" and my life was much better after. no use in keeping them around and always being miserable.

  • happy.healthy.vet July 7, 2009, 10:18 am

    Keep your chin up Caitlin. Most of my Energy Vampires are in my family…seriously. Family vacays are EXHAUSTING. This is why I moved away. But having friends to vent to, and peaceful places to escape help alot!

  • Joelle (The Pancake Girl) July 7, 2009, 10:23 am

    What a great post. 'Energy vampires' is a good term for those people.. you're doing good work, that's all that counts.

  • hemp jogger July 7, 2009, 10:24 am

    great post! love the tags–energy vampires and negative noise…very clever. you are so right, though. that sh*t can really ruin your day, if you allow it to do so…so dont!

    around here, its my dad. he's always nit-picking people on tv, at work, at home. its just so silly to make such ridiculous comments on someone's appearance! it makes me sooo irrate, arg. i have found that making comments does no good, so i tend to ignore or leave the room, and make sure in turn, i never do it. bad karma!

  • Anonymous July 7, 2009, 10:30 am

    One day at work I was spouting nastiness about some other coworkers, and one of my coworkers who was listening to me had the courage to confront me. She just simply reflected back to me what she heard me saying: "You don't like people very much, do you." When I protested that I really did like people, she said, "I wouldn't have known that from the way you behave." No judgement. Just statements.

    It was one of the most profound things anyone ever did for me, and to this day (25 years later)I think about her and how that simple thing really helped me to change. Not every negetive thing that comes your way requires this kind of investment, but it's a good tool to have in your bag when you think it can be effective.

  • Lindsay J July 7, 2009, 10:37 am

    I am so sorry, Caitlin! Negative energy coming from negative people is so draining, and no one needs it!!! I just avoid those people all together. In one ear, out the other. If you listen, it WILL affect you. You do a great job at everything you touch. Keep it up!

  • herewegoagain July 7, 2009, 10:38 am

    My best friend and I – for years – have used an analogy of "fountains" and "drains". The "fountains" are your friends/people who give you energy and renew your strength when you're with them. The "drains" suck energy away. Around five years ago, I made a conscious effort to rid my life of "drains". The friendships weren't healthy. The "drains" that enter my life whom I have no control over (ie the commenters on the blogs) really shouldn't be allowed access to my mood. They can write what they want, but I really just kind of feel sorry for them.

  • Mel @ She Runs Brooklyn July 7, 2009, 10:40 am

    Hey Cailtin!

    Have I mentioned that you rock?

    You rock.

    The part about disengaging your vampires I can definitely relate to. My friends give me a hard time about the way I eat (healthy.. which you would think is a good thing!), but if I steer conversations and social gatherings away from food, then it's no one's business but mine! BAM! take that, vampires.

    Makes life easier. Thanks as always for the great advice!

    Mel

  • Courtney July 7, 2009, 10:51 am

    In the last day, I have had a plethora os anonymous comments on my blog, saying some very, very negative things and bringing down the morale of my blog and myself – this post could not have come at a better time.

    Caitlin, you are one of the most inspiring people I know, and I hope that one day I can radiate the positivity and energy that you do!

    Thank you, thank you!

    -Courtney

  • Sarah (Running To Slow Things Down) July 7, 2009, 10:53 am

    Negative noise isn't worth paying any attention to at all….keep on doing what you're doing! πŸ™‚

  • Julie July 7, 2009, 10:57 am

    So, so true! I think everyone encounters this in some form in their lives, and it's so helpful to remember to not listen and disengage. I love thinking of people like that as "energy vampires"!! The next time something is said or done that would normally upset me, I will remind myself that it's not worth it to pay any attention to energy vampires.

  • Joy July 7, 2009, 10:58 am

    Looks like you turned a negative into a very nice positive!! Thanks. By your comments on "energy vampires, and negative noise" you have once again helped people see a healthy way of handling these types of situations. Also, you can't please all the people all the time, BUT looks like you're reaching a large and diverse group which is good in itself. Many people are being touched in a positive and lovely way. Hope you are enjoying this moment – you deserve too.

  • Priyanka loves food July 7, 2009, 11:02 am

    I think the blogging world is such a beautiful community! You make unknown friends on the other side of the screen and they laugh and rejoice with you in your happiness and give you the encouragement and kind words you need when you are down.I truly adore all the bloggers out here!

    But is the real world out there the same?NO!!! I don't know why but others success bites some people in the rear end and I really don't understand why?

    You are doing a fantastic job Caitlin, never let these Hindrance makers affect you!

    I love this post and tips!! Talking about energy Vampires my friends from college personify that image. I just do one simple thing that is if they bother me, I just avoid them and beyond a point if it bugs me they definitely get a piece of my mind.

  • Mom July 7, 2009, 11:03 am

    Hi Caitlin,

    Tell Kristien how sweet it was of him to take time off from his intense grad program to go with you to FOX News for your TV interview yesterday. I notice him in the pic of the Green Room. He is so supportive and aware of how special you are. I love that guy.

  • Beth @ CrossBorderCravings July 7, 2009, 11:04 am

    Great post Caitlin! Being fairly new to the blogging world, I have yet to see any real negative noise on our site but I am sure it will come eventually! This post gives some great advice for how to overcome that little hurdle.

  • Cyndi July 7, 2009, 11:37 am

    New reader here….hi!

    I deal with an Energy Vampire every day at work. My boss. Who is also my 'friend', who relays every detail of her messed up life, every day. I feel trapped sometimes – how do I 'separate' from this? I can come to work in the best of moods, and then she comes in sighing and negative, and my day is shot. Since she's my boss, if I don't talk to her, she thinks something is 'wrong'.

    So I am now making it a priority to address this somehow – it needs to go away!

    Thanks for the insight@

  • Julia July 7, 2009, 11:50 am

    I'm so sorry you have to deal with meanies. You would think that we grow out of being mean in like the fifth grade, but oh well.
    I'm glad you're keeping positive through this. I have a tendency to be really apathetic about most things, which helps with the negative noise and energy vampires. I guess that falls into your "disengage" category, but honestly, not giving a hoot really helps get me through life! πŸ™‚

  • HangryPants July 7, 2009, 11:57 am

    In the case of anonymous internet brats, they are jealous people with miserable lives.

    In the case of real life "friend" – I call these toxic people flower cutters and ignore them whenever possible.

  • Special K July 7, 2009, 11:58 am

    IGNORING! Works SO WELL! and to help me ignore, I distract. I always read a poem, slather on hand lotion, or have some super food after a vampire sucking…check out my giveaway!
    http://thespecialktreatment.wordpress.com/

  • Jenn Eats Nutritiously Now July 7, 2009, 11:59 am

    You're so right! These people just have mental issues if all they want to do is hurt others anonymously. I'm proud of you for not listening to them or letting them ruin your day.

  • RunToFinish July 7, 2009, 12:04 pm

    ugh there is a women i work with that is ALL about negativity. I finally just decided to try to avoid her and when she engages I try to cut it short.

    I have always lived by the mantra don't complain about something you aren't willing to change

  • RhodeyGirl/Sabrina July 7, 2009, 12:08 pm

    holy crap!

    just read through some of the comments!

    people are crazy!

  • Anne P July 7, 2009, 12:11 pm

    Good post. The only types of vampires worth paying attention to are those that have the last name Cullen πŸ˜‰

  • Anonymous July 7, 2009, 12:40 pm

    Like you well know, some people gain a huge amount of confidence behind the shroud of a computer screen and end up saying things in a really negative way. I honestly think that you're positive energy towards them and other things in life is contagious- don't let them squash it!

    You have acknowledged that you do not intend or think you can save the world with operation beautiful. However, baby steps are how change begins. You are just one person, putting out positive rays into the overwhelmingly huge world. And I thank you! If everyone set out a just a tiny ray, the world would improve immensely. Your role in the world is small, but not futile- don't let anyone tell you anything else

  • Natalie M. July 7, 2009, 12:44 pm

    Isn't amazing that you've found a positive way to inspire women and there are those in the peanut gallery that see fit to critique your efforts? You absolutely positively hit the nail on the head with this post. I've dealt with the same sort of thing in online forums and via emails I received when I actually had a functional blog. Don't stop doing what you're doing Caitlin. It's great to see women supporting women and anyone who tells you otherwise *bleep* em!

  • Caitlin at Healthy Tipping Point July 7, 2009, 12:45 pm

    anon – thank you. that was one of the sweetest anonymous comments i've gotten lately LOL πŸ™‚ i really appreciate it.

  • kilax July 7, 2009, 12:59 pm

    Great post! I have been trying to deal with this for a long time (with family) and am talking to my therapist about it as well. πŸ™‚

  • Quinn July 7, 2009, 1:05 pm

    Love the term – energy vampire. They really do suck the energy outta ya – but I find it best to just take everything with a grain of salt, and say a little prayer for those people. Life is too short to think so negatively!

  • nostorybook July 7, 2009, 2:12 pm

    Hey sweets~

    I am sorry for all the negative commentary on some of the articles about OPeration Beautiful. i have put stickers up at my office and not even the cleaning crews are removing them, which I think is great. I did find an article with omments and left a comment of my own. Struggling with an ED, I think this project is fantastic.

    Just set your path and you will prevail. Take care.

  • Trainer T.s Fitness July 7, 2009, 2:14 pm

    I am an energy person and I RUN from the first site of these types! Yikes, they are usually the ones spreading bad news as well and exceited to do so.

    Thank you for pointing this out and such an insightful way. I am sorry people can not see the good you do for everyone.

    Your amazing!

  • Christie July 7, 2009, 2:16 pm

    I can scarcely read news stories anymore. Every time I do, I notice tons of negative comments. It's not just your story, Caitlin. I noticed it when looking at the most mundane news story — even on my local news website.

    I just wonder, who ARE these people?! I have never met someone (even though I have met plenty of negative people) who looks like they would write in such stuff. Degrading comments with gramatical errors, etc. I really just don't get that.

    However, I love how you deal with it and your terms "energy vampire" and "negative noise". Sounds great!

  • sloank July 7, 2009, 3:24 pm

    I'm loving these posts, Caitlin! I have to say, I encounter "negative noise" more often than I would like… I feel like I have a few friends who still participate in the "fat talk" or just negative talk and it is quite difficult to silence them. I do not participate in the talk as much as possible, however… when hearing these comments it is difficult to ignore them internally and continue with "positive think." I think I might be rambling here! If one of my friends might be a bit negative… sometimes it brings me down too!! However it's great to have you blog and operation beautiful to raise my spirits right back up!!

  • Katey July 7, 2009, 3:37 pm

    I love your blog, and operation beautiful. It is so amazing and inspiring what you are doing! Thank you so much for giving hope to so many women.

  • Lexie July 7, 2009, 3:40 pm

    I can't believe there are people out there leaving negative comments about Operation Beautiful. I guess I should believe it, but that is just so sad. You are doing such an awesome thing…don't let one of those get you down!

  • Jewels July 7, 2009, 3:41 pm

    Just remember Caitlin…all the negative comments are outweighed by ONE person feeling better/benefiting from your mission

  • mtbcy July 7, 2009, 3:44 pm

    Thank you so much for this post and sharing your thoughts. I hope you don't mind if I put a link on my blog: busychicky.blogspot.com. Your words really had an impact on me today and I hope I can share them with a few other people. Thank you!

  • megan July 7, 2009, 4:04 pm

    what great tips, caitlin. i try so hard to ignore the vamps, but sometimes they can really bring a girl down! when I had a blog I got ONE negative comment from a hater and my feelings were crushed for days, so i cant imagine how you deal with them!

    on a bright note, I am having plenty of fun trying to think of The Husband saying "energy vampires" in a british accent, haha. ohh, what I would do to have a fab accent….

  • Becky July 7, 2009, 4:18 pm

    I love the term 'energy vampires!' So fitting. Yeah, after reading some comments on The Salon, makes me realize some people are just messed up and obviously don't get it. Don't let those comments get to you, O.B. is so awesome!! πŸ™‚

  • Katerina July 7, 2009, 4:21 pm

    Just noticed Garmin Forerunner is on for a *wicked* deal on Amazon. I already have one but I know you were looking. It may be a 24 hour thingie.. not sure.

    Oh. and screw the negativity, you rock and remember people who point out fault are usually seeing it in themselves.

  • Julie July 7, 2009, 4:26 pm

    great post! Do not let the negativity come here. I don't understand why people would do that anyway .. Whatever happened to "if you have nothing nice to say do not say anything at all" lol

    http://strivingforbalance.wordpress.com/

  • eatingjourney July 7, 2009, 4:29 pm

    It's so true. Just keep your head up and remember that you're doing this for a reason. You're on freaking TV…hello! That's amazing. That means that what you're doing is beyond anything that those people could think of to advance the beauty of women from the inside out.

    Secondly, I think that I have a lot of negative thoughts. I suck the own energy from myself. I am making a concious effort to stop this. I have honestly been doing this, and it's so helpful. It's amazing how sometimes people's inner voices are stronger and more detrimental than anything outside of them.

  • Anonymous July 7, 2009, 4:32 pm

    Caitlin, I loved this post. It's funny that you wrote about negative noise today, because I've been experiencing it in my own life recently as well. Your post reminded me that the way we deal with negativity in our lives determines how we feel–not what other people say. Thank you for reminding me of that!
    You are doing an amazing thing with Operation Beautiful. Forget those naysayers; what you have inspired people to do for themselves and others is so positive and wonderful! You are absolutely right–in a world of criticism and high concern with body image, we NEED Operation Beautiful. I'm sending good vibes your way–keep on keepin' on, girl!

  • NYgirl@heart July 7, 2009, 5:46 pm

    People have to have someone to blame for their unhappiness. If they find someone who's doing something positive, they have to find a way to stop them…otherwise, they'll have to admit that they're the problem, not you…you know what I mean? You reap what you sew and they will always be sad, pathetic little people because the can't see what you see.
    The only things you can do are exactly what you listed…ignore, stay away, and feel sympathy (if that) because they're so, so sad.
    Just look at the posts people have left you. You have made a difference in so many lives (including mine) All those negative people–they can suck it.
    YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!!

  • Ashley @ On The Rocks July 7, 2009, 5:59 pm

    I just cannot comprehend why anyone would want to spend their time leaving negative comments for you. Some people really just are so unhappy with themsevles, they are determined to bring down everyone else. It's sad really.

  • Paige@ RunningaroundNormal July 7, 2009, 5:59 pm

    This is a great post. Sometimes it's hard to deal with the nay-sayers and those who are negative just to bring other people down, and this is great advice on how to deal!

  • lauren July 7, 2009, 6:05 pm

    hey there…haven't commented in awhile, but have been keeping up with your idea for "Operation Beautiful". I think it is a unique and wonderful thing you are doing. Congrats on all the press…it is completely refreshing to see the press covering positive things! πŸ™‚

  • Oh She Glows July 7, 2009, 6:21 pm

    I love love love this post. Good for you for writing this!!!! No one is allowed to make you feel inferior without your consent- My BEST advice! I love you girlie!

  • roseyrebecca July 7, 2009, 6:26 pm

    Noise is all it is. It doesn't matter. I never listen to negativity- there's too many other, more important things to worry about!

    Great Post! You're such an inspiration! I don't even know how anybody could possibly say anything bad about Operation Beautiful. They obviously only feel bad about themselves.

  • Ilene July 7, 2009, 7:05 pm

    Thank you SO much for bringing up energy vampires and negative noise. I have recently realized some "friends" who are more negative and impeding to me, and I'm working on how to deal with them. Your advice has helped a lot, and I definitely won't let them get to me! Thanks, Caitlin!

  • Megan July 7, 2009, 7:16 pm

    I always figured if you have nothing nice to say don't say anything.. I think what you are doing as great.. and for as many haters there are there are double the people who think its awesome! These peopel are just jealous you came up with the idea!

  • MarathonVal July 7, 2009, 7:22 pm

    I love this post – not only is OB an amazing thing, but just bringing up the topic of negativity vs. positivity is so important for people to stop and think about. I am sure all of us have had people in our lives like that at some point in time, and while it is hard to dismiss their comments and poor attitude, and is imperative to our own happiness. You are completely right, karma is a bitch, and it is so much easier in the end to just ignore the ignorant people in the world. There are too many amazing people that deserve more of your attention! πŸ™‚

  • Mary :: A Merry Life July 7, 2009, 7:22 pm

    I love this post and I'm really sorry that you and OB are encountering this. I've definitely encountered energy vampires before and have had to distance myself from these kinds of people. It's just not worth it. Your tips for dealing with this are great. Remember your own advice!

  • Sarah July 7, 2009, 7:26 pm

    Good for you for not getting caught up in anyone's negativity. I know for myself that a mean comment can really bring me down, and it is great that you can focus your energies to ignore it.

    Your projects are beautiful, and deserve all the praise in the world.

  • Amanda July 8, 2009, 5:09 am

    Caitlin,
    What an awesome post on such a frustrating topic! Yes, I've dealt with energy vampires and it is draining. TOo much to write in this comment. πŸ™‚ Often I think they have jealousy issues or feel threatened.
    I use a water metaphor and remind myself to put on the raincoat and let the water roll right off my back.
    Have a great day!!

  • leslie July 8, 2009, 5:27 am

    i saw some of the negative operation beautiful comments, and i agree – just tune out the negative noise. wherever there is positivity, negativity is bound to creep in. i wish it were different, but i think the best thing we can do is not let it affect us and devote our energy to things that are healthy and positive, as you so wisely said.

    i've encountered this many times before, and as a a fairly self-conscious person, taking my own advice to ignore it can be difficult. for some reason, one negative comment can outweigh a hundred positive ones. but all your tips are true – i'll keep them in mind. πŸ™‚

  • seesaraheat July 8, 2009, 8:49 am

    My mom always says that people like that are on roller coasters and that I don't need to get on it with them. It helps me to visualize myself standing on a platform and watching the coaster take off while I'm waving them goodbye. Great post πŸ™‚

  • Dana July 8, 2009, 4:32 pm

    What you created with Operation Beautiful and what everyone around the world is doing to support the mission is wonderful. Anyone who says otherwise is a hater, and is probably sad they didn't think of it first. I encounter many miserable people daily in my job (nurse) who are not appreciative of anything or anyone, and they don't see anything positive ever. It's draining after a while. But all you can do is hold your head up high and know that you are not going to stoop to their level. I posted a note in our work bathroom yesterday, I'm curious to see if it is still there! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!

  • postcollegecook July 8, 2009, 6:56 pm

    Caitlin, thanks for this post. I've dealt with my share of negative noise on my blog and it has sucked more energy from me than I care to admit.

    Thankfully, I was able to employ what we call a Bozo Filter — where any time the offenders comment THEY are the only ones who can see their comments. They feel like they're getting their kicks by bringing me down, but no one else can read their noise. It's awesome!

  • Anonymous July 8, 2009, 7:37 pm

    I think you have trouble though distinguishing between "negative noise" and opinions that differ from your own.

  • roseyrebecca July 8, 2009, 9:39 pm

    Seriously, what could possibly be wrong with leaving uplifting, motivational post-its for people to see and feel better about themselves? What other opinion is there? Why would anybody possibly be against this movement? What is there to argue about? The anonymous comments are stupid and if they don't like Operation Beautiful, they should keep their mouths shut.

  • Angie (Losing It and Loving It) July 9, 2009, 11:38 am

    Caitlin,
    I have missed the posts you speak of with negative comments but I just want to say that a lot of people online who make such comments are just trolls and they do this type of thing all the time to get a rile out of people, it's their sick mission in life. It's best to just ignore and delete those comments and move on. Don't give them your time.

    You are doing an AMAZING thing and don't let anyone try to tell you differently. There are just some unhappy people in the world and nothing will ever make them happy.

    As for me encountering negativity, yes I do and it's just so sad that these people nit pick at some things. I just don't get it so I ignore it. Life is too short!

  • Caz November 4, 2009, 9:39 pm

    Thanks for this! I’ve recently had a LOT of negativity in my workplace recently and it’s great to be reminded to ignore it!

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